Logan walked out of the bar with Jubilee's arm slung over his shoulder to support her.
"I'm sorry that this took so much longer than I thought Jubes. I figured we'd be back 'fore yer birthday."
"That's ok Wolvie," she slurred out. She was quite obviously plastered. "I'd rather be with you than havin' a party er somethin'. 'Sides it be three more years till I could do this back home."
"Anythin' else ya like to celebrate yer birthday 'fore we head back and get ready ta celebrate yer first hangover," Wolverine said turning his head to look at her.
"Well there is somethin I been wantin' ta do fer a while but didn't 'cause I was just a kid," Jubilee said.
"Maybe legally but goin' through what ya been through ya ain't been a kid fer a long time. So what is it ya wanted ta do?"
"Well just this," and she yanked him to her and kissed him square on the lips.
(Note from Jason Barnett: I figured maybe Yukio was right and maybe Jubes did have a crush on Logan but I also figured she never do anything about it if she was thinking clearly)
Logan had lived a long time--seen and done things that most men could only dream of. As a result, there was very little in the world that could surprise him anymore. He had sometimes wondered if he was incapable of that emotion, he had not felt it for so long.
Shock, the type that rattled him to his bones, flooded his body and for a moment he found that he could not think. All he could focus on was the lithe body leaning against him, the heavy smell of whiskey, and Jubilee's lips pressed against his own. And then his senses returned to him.
He grabbed Jubilee's arms and roughly shoved the inebriated girl away from his body. She staggered, reaching out a hand to his chest to steady herself. Logan danced out of her reach, his throat tightening. He couldn't explain the emotions running through him--tightening his chest. All he knew was that he just couldn't bear to have her touch him. Not now. Not until he figured out what had happened and what he was feeling.
She kissed me! The thought flitted through his mind, raising hives of conflict.
"Jubilee," he whispered hoarsely, and cleared his throat loudly.
"Why'd you stop, Wolvie?" She whispered, and then held a hand to her head. She groaned. "I think I'm gonna be sick." Jubilee lifted her eyes to Logan's face, blearily raking over his features. A moment later, she fainted dead away.
Logan growled, for an instant forgetting the event that had just transpired. He caught her in his arms, ignoring the knowing leers of the passerby. He gave them his Look, and they scurried away.
Cradling Jubilee to his chest, Logan looked down at her pasty face. The smell of whiskey coated her breath. He shook his head, the memory of her kiss resurfacing.
"Well kid...if we're lucky, this'll be one birthday that ya will forget."
She stirred in his arms, and Logan sighed. It would be easier for him, at least, if she never remembered this night. He had no wish to answer the question she had asked him with her kiss.
Jubilee still in his arms, he made his way down the street to their hotel.
Some time around noon Jubilee woke up and she really wished she hadn't. "Oh God." She groaned and put a hand to her throbbing head. A bad taste was in her mouth. She lie there for a few minutes and then crawled out from under the covers.
"The rooms swaying." She muttered to herself. Her ankle was caught in the sheets and she fell to the floor. "Umph!" She untangled herself from the sheets. "I need asprin." She muttered to herself lying there for a moment. She was dressed in jeans and a t shirt, the same ones she had worn last night. She thought.
She stood up carefully and walked to the bathroom. She needed a shower and to get dressed. Wolvie was probably in the dinning room having lunch. After she was done she might as well meet him. She winced at the bright light shining through the window. She thought.
Logan was sitting in the dinning room having lunch. He had gone by Jubilee's room earlier and she was still asleep. Probably just as well, he still had no idea what to do about last night.
Just then Jubilee pulled up a chair at his table and sat down. She was wearing a blue dress and had on sunglasses. "Don't ever let me do that again." She told him.
"Do what?" He asked putting down his fork.
"Drink anything that comes from a bar. I have never felt so bad in my whole life." She said mournfully. "What time does our plane leave?" She asked.
"Five." He told her and she put her head in her hands. He looked at her hard for a moment for her to say anything else.
Jubilee stared right back, lifting her right hand to her sunglasses. She lowered them a fraction and looked at Logan with bloodshot eyes.
"Wolvie? Why are you looking at me like that?"
Logan smoothly lowered his eyes and picked up his fork. "No big deal," he said. "Just tryin' to figure out how you're feelin'."
Jubilee snorted. "That should be obvious. I can't even remember how we got home last night."
Logan said nothing, suddenly intent on his lunch. Jubilee glanced at his plate, and turned a light shade of green. "You know," she said, swallowing heavily. "I think I may go back up to the room...lay down, or something. I still don't...feel so good."
"Just be sure to get ready for the flight back," Logan told her, standing with her as she rose on shaky legs. She waved off his outstretched hand, and with a weak grin, stumbled out of the restaurant and back to her room.
Jubilee closed the heavy oak door behind her, kicking off her shoes before she slid heavily onto the bed. She didn't think she would fall asleep--just meant to rest until her stomach and head settled--but moments later, she slipped into darkness. And dreamt.
She could feel Wolverine beside her--she knew he was there, though she could not see him. The blood roared in her ears, but his voice cut through the static in her head. "Anything else ya'd like to celebrate for yer birthday 'fore we head back and get ready ta celebrate yer first hangover?" he asked.
Like an observer hanging back unseen, she heard herself answer, "Well there is somethin' I've been wantin' ta do for a while but didn't, 'cause I was just a kid."
Jubilee's breath caught in her throat, and she tried to fight down the terrible, ominous, pressure in her chest. Wolverine stirred.
"Maybe legally, but goin' through what you've been through, you ain't been a kid fer a long time. So what is it you wanted to do?"
Stopstopstopstop, Jubilee wanted to tell herself, but she could already feel her body moving, raising an arm to hook around Logan's neck, feeling his breath hot on her face. He stiffened with surprise as she spoke near his mouth.
"Well just this." And then she felt herself kissing him, pressing her lips on his own.
Jubilee came wide awake, and for several long seconds she stared at the ceiling. She could still feel Wolverine's lips on her own, and she was suddenly struck by a terrible realization that filled her with horror. She groaned into the still air of her hotel room.
"What in the hell have I done?"
Jubilee sat next to the window watching the clouds drift past as the plane flew across the sea. Logan seemed to be intensely interested in the back of the chair in front of him.
Unable to stay silent any longer she turned to him and said "I'm sorry."
"No need to worry darlin'." He smiled at her but was unable to look her in the eye, "everyone gets drunk now and again"
"Wolvie I mean I'm sorry for...well." she turned a deep shade of pink. "for kissing you."
Wolverine was unable to say anything for along time after that but somehow he managed to mumble "s'okay."
They spent the rest of the trip in a state of terminal embarrassment!
Jubilee's thoughts were interrupted when she felt the plane's wheels touch the land.
"Get ready darling" Logan said. Jubilee nodded, stretching her arms.
They descended from the plane and caught a cab. They made the trip from the airport to the mansion without talking. The cab parked at the gate of the big house. Jubilee saw Jean standing at the door and waved happily to her. She quickened her pace, leaving Logan a few steps behind her. Once she reached Jean the woman gave her a big hug.
"Welcome back Jubilee! Happy birthday! Jean said, giving her a kiss and tugging her ears.
"Hey, leave that!" chuckled Jubilee, rubbing her ears.
"Greetings Red" said Logan, catching up.
"Hello Logan, I'm glad you managed to bring Jubilee back on time for her party." Said Jean smiling to him.
"Party? Are you guys throwing a party for me?" asked Jubilee, her eyes bright.
"Of course we're sugar! Or did you think for a moment we'd let that only you and Wolverine had all the fun?" said Rogue joining them.
"By the way." asked Jean, "How was your trip?"
"Interesting" Both Jubilee and Wolverine replied simultaneously. They glanced at each other... Jubilee's cheeks turning a few shades red.
Both woman watched the scene not understanding. Jubilee saw the question coming and hurried to grab their hands.
"Shall we go inside? I wanna see what you guys prepared."
Late that night.
Jubilee yawned for the tenth time in 5 minutes. The celebration had been great and she was really tired. Right now, she was laying in the long sofa her head on Wolverine's shoulder. All the others were upstairs catching some zz's.
She was also falling asleep. She had stayed awake watching a horror movie with Wolvie, but it was quite boring and her eyelids were getting heavier and heavier. However, she hadn't moved because she liked to have Wolverine all for herself. She felt warm and cosy at his side. She stirred, softly putting her head between Wolverine's shoulder and upper chest. He caressed her head with one hand.
"Darling it's late. I think we should both got to sleep." He whispered. Jubilee sighed and nodded slowly rising her body from the sofa.
They walked upstairs together.
"Good night, Kiddo".
"Good night, Wolvie" Jubilee said, giving him a soft kiss on the cheek. He eyed her and she smiled innocently.
"Go to sleep Jubilee." Logan said. She obeyed, walking to her room. Before opening her door she turned around and saw Wolverine, also at the foot of his door, looking at her. He opened it quickly and walked inside closing the door.
After a few seconds Jubilee did the same with her door.
(A note from Mica: Hope this doesn't suck. I apologize in advance for any grammar/tense mistake. Keep writing guys, I love this story!)
"Scott," Jean said, "Do you think Logan and Jubilee were acting strange today?"
Scott thought for a moment then answered. "Definately. I mean they couldn't even seem to look each other in the eye today. Do you have any idea what was the matter with them?"
"Scott you know I don't read people's minds without permission and they weren't leaking any thoughts.
Warren and Betsy's room....
"What is wrong with you tonight, Betts? You seem tense."
"Something was bothering Wolverine and Jubilee but I don't know what. I tried to probe their minds but they were so tense their shields were up automatically and they would have realized."
"Well if they had shields up here then they obviously didn't want anyone in their heads."
Once Wolverine and Jubilee had fallen asleep they both dreamt of the kiss. Not really surprising since it was such a shock to both of them but not good with two sleeping telepaths nearby. As they dreamt their thoughts broadcasted as their shields were down.
Psylocke and Phoenix both ended up in the dreams.
"Betsy? What are you doing here?"
"The same as you, I seem to be caught up in someone else's dream. Do you know whose it is yet?"
Jean glanced around and saw Logan supporting the drunk Jubilee as they walked back to their hotel. "I'd guess one of their's probably"
The two telepaths watched the conversation and then gasped in shock as Jubes kissed Wolverine. They stared at each other wide eyed.
"Oh my God."
"Oh my God."
The next morning
Whirl. Lunge and sweep. The blade of the sword flashed in the dim Danger Room lights, sending motes of brilliant reflected light scattering around the barren walls. Sidestep. Thrust. Logan spun, carefully balanced, the katana dancing in his hands as he battled an invisible opponent. The spirit of the sword form drove away the persistent, nagging thoughts of --
He growled as his mind slipped again and tried to refocus.
"I never thought a sword was your first choice of weapon, Logan," Came a gentle, almost teasing voice from the half-open doorway.
Now further distracted, Wolverine reluctantly ended the kata, sheathing the sword at his side with a small show of ritual before turning to face Jean Grey. "Needed somethin' a little more challengin' than what I'm used ta doin'," he replied, mopping sweat off his chest and shoulders with a towel.
Jean watched him silently for a moment. "Trying to improve skills or trying to forget something?" she finally asked, tone carefully neutral. Her conversation with Betsy earlier that morning replayed briefly in her mind. None of our business? With both of them skittering around here like they're walking on glass? We should say *something*... Why don't you talk to Logan?
Suspiciously, he cut his eyes up at her as he slipped into the jacket of his ghi. "What'cha gettin' at, Jeannie? It's not like ya to beat 'round the bush. Get to it."
She followed him out of the Danger Room and towards the dormitory wing of the Mansion, walking quietly for a short way, carefully choosing her words. "I'm sure that you know what you're doing, Logan, but ... well, Bestsy and I are a little worried about Jubilee."
His eyes narrowed dangerously. "What about Jubilee?"
Jean pressed on. "Neither she nor you have been acting quite normal since your return. You can't expect psi's of our strength not to notice how formidable your shields have become, as well. That kind of reinforcement sings even when you're not looking for it."
"And? That bother you?" Logan said, a little more curtly than he had intended.
Jean pushed her thick red hair back away from her face and looked at him closely. "What have you been dreaming of lately, Logan?"
His hand gripped the hilt of the sword her wore tightly, knuckles whitening. "Ya know I don't like nobody playin' about in my mind, Jean," he snapped. "Had too many enemies messin' around in there for friends to go pokin' where they're not invited."
She continued persistantly, ignoring his sudden flare of temper. He's more uncomfortable about this than I imagined. "What have you been dreaming when your shields are partly down ... when your shields might very well trickle fragments of dreams to Betsy and myself?"
An iron fist gripped Logan's stomach suddenly and he swore under his breath. "It's not your business, Red. She was drunk. I was there. She ..." He parroted back the rationale he'd been telling himself these last few days. If she'd really *meant* it, she'd have pressed the matter, right? Jubes isn't one to let sleepin' dogs lie. Right? The thoughts nattered in his head behind his careful mental shield, refusing to be banished but unable to be believed.
"Want to talk about it?"
Gruffly, in growing irritation, he replied, "No. It's not a problem, Jean. There's nothin' ta talk about."
The sudden scrape of wheels on the uncarpeted floor alerted the two X-Men to a potential collision ahead. Jubilee careened around the corner, her pink shades cast back on head, her roller blades speeding her cheerfully along.
"Whoops!" Turning sharply to avoid rolling over the pair, the teenage mutant skidded to a soft, bumping halt against the wall. "You two're in the way!" she laughed. "What do ya think you're doing, *walking* in a perfectly good speedway?"
Jean tried to stiffle her smile. "I thought the Professor asked you to skate *outside* from now own?"
Jubilee grinned a little. "Well, I was *going* outside..." Her eyes flitted from Jean to Logan and lingered for a moment, her grin falling a fraction. "Hey, Wolvie."
"Hiya, Jubes," he replied with a strange awkwardness, remembering the past night -- remembering walking her to her room last night, hesitating before he went into his own room, seeing her notice the hesitation. Remembering the peculiar emotions that flickered through his dreams. With her eyes on him, he suddenly felt oddly self-conscious of his limp, open ghi and bared chest.
He growled silently at himself for being silly, conscious also of Jean's eyes intent on them both. "Ya better get on outside then. Don't want chuck ta call another 'family meetin' on the subject."
"Ever wanted to learn how to roller blade?" She was grinning brightly at him again.
"Not now, darlin'." He chuckled wryly. "Maybe later." She nodded at him with an I-take-that-as-a-promise look and shoved off down the hallway again, leaving tiny wheel skids on the polished floor. Wolverine shook his head.
After Jubilee had gone, Jean rested one hand lightly on his arm. "That didn't look like 'nothin' ta talk about.'"
Shaking her hand off, Logan extricated himself from the conversation. "Well, it ain't. Now let me go shower and you and Betsy can stop worrying over nothin'. The kid and I can take care of ourselves." leaving her in the hallway, he headed back to his room feeling less certain than he hoped he sounded.
The same morning--an hour later
"Hey Bobby! Gimme the jam, wouldja?" Jubilee sat down in her chair and streched out her hand towards Bobby.
"Sure. Here." Bobby handed her the jam. "So what's it feel like to be eighteen?"
Jubilee shrugged. "Like bein' 17. Whass the diffrence?"
While Bobby and Jubilee sat there chatting, Betsy and Warren came in the door. Bobby noticed that Betsy threw some rather weird glances over to Jubilee.
"Hey guys!" Jubilee greeted them.
"Yeah.. Uh.. Hi Jubilee."
Jubilee thought Betsy was acting kinda weird but she shrugged it off. It was probably nothing.
(A Note from Sascha: Ok, so this was short. But I really only wrote this to let you guys know that I really like this story. *smile* That I really, really like it!)
Jubilee bit into her toast just as Logan walked into the room. Betsy looked at Logan for a long second before quickly turning away, hoping her hadn't noticed her stare.
Jubilee raised an eyebrow as Logan sat down,
"Hey Wolvie, sleep well?" she asked, swallowing her bite of toast.
Logan looked at her for a second, his gaze unreadable before mumbling a quick 'yes' in reply.
Jubilee nodded before shifting uncomfortably in her seat.
'God, why'd I have to go an do something as stupid as kiss him for? Sure I've been wantin' to do it for ages, but...Dammit, this is all so awkward.'
Wolverine stared at Jubilee out of the corner of his eye, remembering the dream of last night.
Betsy caught a fragment of Wolverine's dream. She almost choked on her coffee. She quickly excused herself and made her way to the door. Just then Scott came in. "Danger Room session in ten minutes", he ordered. Various complaint's and groans came from numerous members of the table but slowly one by one they all stood up and left until Wolverine and Jubilee were the only ones left in the kitchen.
Jubilee looked around, how had this happened, she should have gotten up when the other's had. "Um well I better go change", she muttered standing. Wolverine caught her arm. "We're actin like kid's darlin, this is ridiculous, you were drunk...and weren't thinkin clearly, it didn't mean anything...right", Wolverine quickly said. Jubilee gathered her composure, "Yeah right", she confirmed and quickly exited the kitchen.
Wolverine stayed and began to think about what he was going to do. His words seemed to have assured Jubilee that everything was fine, but they weren't working so well on him. Finally with a frustrated sigh he stood up and went outside and got on his Harley. 'Best just to leave fer while and let it work itself out over time', he told himself though he was wondering why the hell he felt so guilty. Before he could change his mind though he revved it up and drove off. A bit Later he stopped at a small in outside of town to get a little shut eye.
Meanwhile Jubilee was upstairs packing a few things. 'It's just best if I left awhile, let things calm down, won't go for to long, just a while...better leave a not', she thought to herself pushing her guilty conscience aside. Finally she moved downstairs and outside where she drove off in her Miata. She drove for awhile before ending up in a small inn outside of town to rest.
Logan's bike was parked on the opposite side so Jubilee didn't see it when she parked. She checked in and got the key to her room. As she unlocked the door she noticed a peculiar smell next door. 'Smells like one a Wolvie's stinky cigars,' she thought. As she shut her door the door next door opened and Logan stepped out.
(Note from Jason Barnett: I was thinking about the last part I wrote with Warren and Betsy talking about Jubes and Wolvie and I got this great image in my head. Betsy's pacing as she talked but when she reached one wall instead of turning she walks through the shadows and reappears where she started and just keeps doing it over and over. As as shes doing it Warren keeps turning his head following her and when she starts over he jerks his head back to where she started from.)
Running her fingers through her dark hair, Jubilee sighs. She'd been laying on the hotel room's lumpy full-sized bed counting the stains on the ceiling for a half-hour...trying to think of things other than...that kiss. She groaned and sat up, swinging her legs over the side of the bed and jumping swiftly to her feet. She couldn't forget about it.
As she paced the small room, trying to come up with a rational way to come to grips with her actions...her feelings, tiny particles of light flashing from her fingertips absently, like someone biting their fingernails, She sighed once more and flopped back down on the bed.
On a lark, She began playing around with her unique mutant powers again...realizing long before now that she could lose herself to the wonder of it and forgot her problems for a little while...Such a temptation was too strong for her to resist at the moment.
Spheres of many-hued lights were born, flashed and died in mini-seconds as if they were smaller versions of the stars in the night sky, smaller and brighter, their existence sped up to seconds instead of millions of years. As she made the newest and last, before another was made to take it's place, light snapped and fizzled and finally supernova'ed out of sight within the space between her two hands, She shook her head. She lowered her hands. The smell of burning wafting through the air, the last of her wondrous display ceasing to be, Jubilee realized that she had not forgotten. She also realized that she could not just lay around and hide until things blew over, if they ever would.
"They'll be talking about this at my retirement party."
Jubilee knew she had to do something. But first, She thought as she pulled back the deadlock on the door, I need a candy bar.
Logan sat in a chair next to the window. He glanced outside, drawing in on the cigar he held between his teeth at the same time. It looked like rain. More than looked. He could smell it. The charge in the air that made his course black hair stand on end reminded him of 'Ro.
He always could love a good storm. He almost smiled at that thought...would have...had he not been thinking about the kid.
He let out a barely audible growl and plucked the half-smoked cigar from his mouth, putting out the smoke by pressing his thumb and forefinger against the light and smothering it. His healing factor kicked in a second later and healed the slight burns on his thumb and finger so fast that to anyone watching, who did not know Logan, would have thought he suffered no pain from putting out his cigar like that.
But Logan knew different. He felt the slight pain of the hot cigar on his skin. Felt it for the tiny second it was there and welcomed it. It was slight distraction from a much more staggering pain...How to deal with the emotions Jubilee seemed to have stirred within him.
Suddenly, as the breeze shifted, he raised himself up straighter, his eyes wide.
He ran to the door of his room, swinging open the all ready unlocked door and stepping outside. He knew she was near. He sniffed the air deeply. Glanced breifly at the gathering clouds. In fact, if all that light blinking on and off from the window of the room next door to him and the smell of something burning was any clue at all, he's guess she was right next door.
"Oh, Jubilee." He moaned, deeply disturbed, "Did ya follow me, darlin'?"
He asked this of the night and the rain and his pounding blood, loud in his ears. Almost as loud as the sound of his own heart beating in his chest as he raised a hand to knock on the door next to his.
Just he was about to knock the door swung open.
Jubilee gasped and smiled and frowned and looked quite shocked.
"Ummm..Hiya Wolvie." She tried for flippancy, "How ya doing?"
Logan just stared at her. In his eyes she could see a thousand lives, a thousand deaths and more pain than she dared ever even dream of knowing herself...though she knew a lot. But beneath all that, somewhat hidden, always there, always...was Logan, paitent, kind, caring, loyal and...She realized...Oh, God...She realized she felt more for him than just a mere crush....
Jubilee gasped again inwardly and averted her eyes from his. She couldn't bear to look at him. Not right now.
"Jubilation." He spoke her name. She raised her eyes, barely. He never called her by her full first name unless he was very very serious, "I think it's time we talked."
Yeah, She thought as she stepped into the room and moved aside so he could follow, And I don't know where to begin...
(Note from Skayda: I think this is a very interesting story. I'll be waiting and watching and reading to see where it goes, how it developes. :D Sorry for any spelling or grammer or any other mistakes I make. It's eight in the morning here and I didn't sleep all night and well...after seven or eight cups of coffe sometimes your brain ain't working quite the way it should. lol. Also please bear in mind that I've not read any of the comics with Jubilee and Wolverine in them and I know her only from the fan fiction on the net and from what my boyfriend tells me...(he's an avid comic book collector))
She shut the door and walked over to flop down on the bed. Wolverine sat down on a chair and tried to think of what he wanted to say. He could barely bring himself to look at her. He had never felt awkward around her before.
Jubilee was having the same problem. In fact she was looking everywhere in the room except at Wolverine. She couldn't look at him now that she knew for a fact she felt more than just a crush on him. Especially when she was sure that he didn't feel the same. 'I hope I haven't totally ruined our friendship just 'cause I got drunk.'
Both finally got up the nerve to speak. "About the kiss," they both said at the same time. Wolverine and Jubilee both chuckled at that the tension in the air lessened just slightly. "Thought that only happened on TV," Jubes said. The silence resumed, each waiting for the other to start speaking.
"Jubes..." Logan began, just as Jubilee said; "Wolvie.."
"Okay if I go first, Darlin'?" Logan asked, folding his muscular arms across his chest. He leaned back in the chair as far as he dared go without the risk of tipping backwards in an undignified heap. His stance appeared relaxed, yet he was anything but.
Jubilee nodded, sitting down on the edge of the bed, her hands folded in her lap in an attempt to keep them still rather than in any ladylike posture. She had the urge to fling herself into his arms and just bawl. Her emotions were strung tighter than Cyclop's underwear at the moment.
"I know you look up to me as a kind of father figure, Jubilee." He started, slowly, every word piercing her heart, "We've been through some rather rough times together..."
She found herself staring at her feet, blinking back tears. Her chest felt like she'd swallowed a rock. It hurt. It hurt bad. She was afraid to look up at him.
"I know that a lot of times girls get crushes on men a lot older than them 'cause they've helped them or cared about them...as I care about you...but..."
"Stop it!" She hissed though clenched teeth, her hands clenched into white-knuckled fists on her lap, her dark eyes blazing with hurt and fury, She felt herself crack and suddenly she was screaming, like some horrible figure in a daytime t.v. drama, but she couldn't help it...She couldn't stop the words from pouring out of her...pouring out of her soul, so long kept hidden; "It's not like that! You know it's not! For God's Sake, Wolvie! Open your eyes Dammit! You said yourself I'm hardly a kid...I'm a grown woman! And I love you! I love you!"
Jubilee did not realize it, but she was sobbing. Without shame or guilt. She raised her head and glared at him, daring him to do anything about it. About her.
He stood up and came to her. Sitting down on the bed beside her, she waited one second before flinging herself into his arms as she used to, when she was younger, when he was her steadfast hero and nothing could ever touch her as long as he was with her...Nothing could ever hurt her.
She clung to his shirt, wetting it with her tears. He held her as she sobbed, felt her pain as only a best can...a near soul-mate and as she settled down...whispering that she loved him over and over, he tucked her allready half-asleep form into the hotel bed and reached to tenderly brush the damp hair from her cheek.
He'd been steadily aware of his feelings for her growing to more than just friendship...so much more.
The stirring in his our heart grew and he shoved it down into his guts as far as it would go...yet still felt the stabbing pain...the yearning for something he wouldn't allow himself. He loved her too and wasn't that problem? Wasn't it always?
"I'm sorry, Darlin'." He whispered as he closed the hotel door behind him, leaving her beautiful form asleep in the bed, heading back to his own room, "I can't. I just can't be what you want right now."
He had never run from a thing in his life. Logan sighed and growled, feeling shame crawl across his skin, like tiny ants with razor-teeth to eat into his skin and into his heart and soul...He fell asleep with Mistress Whiskey that night.
She woke from a sound sleep, eyes red from crying and nose a bit runny. Wiping her face with the top sheet of her bed she blinked to accomidate her eyes to the darkness.
There was something she should be remembering.
She felt drained. As if she's ran a Danger Room session longer than was good for her. She shook her head, trying to focus...
Something...no...some one. She glanced at the chair across from her, an image flashed through her mind. Wolvie. He was here. She told him she loved him. He held her as she let out all her bottled up emotions and then...
Her mind failed her. She couldn't remember. She saw him tucking her into the bed like she was a child, stroking her hair, and then...then he just left.
"No." She said, startling herself for speaking aloud, "I'm not gonna let it end like that! I'm not!"'
Jubilee had felt his heart pounding as he held her, she knew he felt more for her than he was saying...She knew she would always be in his heart...but she wanted to be in his arms...where she knew he knew she belonged...
Without grabbing a jacket, She opened her door and crept over to his room.
As usual, The door was unlocked.
He was awake. His eyes were closed and he was in bed, his pants and shirt hanging up in the bathroom, dripping wet from the rain he'd walked in, drying. But he was not sleeping. Too many nightmares...too many memories for him to sleep all that much anyway. It was better to be awake.
His keen ears caught the sound of the door opening, just a soft whoosh against the carpeted floor followed by a short breeze with the smell of rain and a footfall on the floor. He breathed in and could smell her...Jubilee...He heard her breathing slowly as she closed the door.
She stood still near the bed, gazing down at him for a moment...lost...either in thought or emotion or something else. Logan cracked his eye and noticed that she had walked withou a jacket, in the rain. Her blouse and jeans were soaked clear through.
Without speaking she removed her clothes, leaving on only her bra and panties. She walked to the other side of the bed, and when he felt the mattress move to accommodate her slight weight, he spoke; "You should go back to your own room, Jubilee."
"I can't, Wolvie." She whispered, "I need you and you need me...please..."
"I can't." He said, "I'm sorry...I...We can't...Tomorrow, I'll take you back to the others."
"You don't care." She said, frightening slow, "How could be so stupid."
"That's where your wrong, Jubilation." He said, turning to her, "I care about you too much and that's the problem. I know you don't understand now...but someday you will."
"I don't think so." She said, turning from him, curling up into a ball, "Happy Eighteenth, Jubilee." She said bitterly. "If this is what real love feels like...I wish...I wish I was dead."
(Note from Skayda: Okay, so it's kinda melodramatic.)
Logan looked over at Jubilee when she said that. She was curled up in a ball and fighting not to start crying again. He was feeling so torn right now. He was doing this to keep her from getting hurt in the future. People he got truly close to ended up dead most of the time. But right here and now he was hurting her so much himself he couldn't stand it. He wanted to go and comfort her but honestly he wasn't sure if he could trust himself.
Slowly, as if even the slight act of moving hurt, Jubilee sat up and walked to the window. She drew back the cheap, off-white motel curtains and watched the rain streak the glass of the window. Her cheeks were streaked with the rain of her tears...which had yet to dry.
She watched the sky turn pinkish-purple with the dawn...
She could feel Logan behind her, heard the strike of a match and the slow inhale of breath as he took in a drag off one of his cigars...probably one he saved...She could feel his eyes on her back. She didn't turn around. The rain kept falling. Her heart kept bleeding...hurting.
"There's only one thing to do." She said at last, so deadly serious that her voice seemed as cold as ice...not like herself at all. "I have to go away. Far away..."
"No...Jubilee, Ya don't." Logan said from behind her, "I'm the one who oughta go..."
"I just want to know why, Wolvie?" Jubilee asked, spinning around to face him, her eyes were huge and her bottom lip quivered slightly. She looked so much like the child he'd befriended not all that long ago and taken care of in all the ways that count that he couldn't resist the urge to wrap his arms about her and hold her. She shoved him away and repeated her question, her eyes narrowing now to mere dark slits, her face suddenly hardening. "Am I not good enough for you?"
She seemed to be standing at a distance, watching herself, horrified at what she was saying and not being able to stop herself. It disgusted her that somewhere inside her...as much as she wanted Wolvie to love her as she loved him...She wanted to make him hurt as she was hurting now...
"Darlin', It's not that." He said, "You're too good for me."
"Then what's the problem, Wolvie?" She asked, all the spleen gone from her voice now, "What?"
"I don't want to see you hurt." He said, "And everyone I'm real close to normally ends up six feet under..."
"I can take care of myself." She said, "Wolvie...I won't die on ya, if that what your so worried about..."
"Jubilee, God girl...It's taking every fiber of strength I have just to keep my hands offa ya..." He said, "I look at you and see a beautiful woman, a still naive yet curious girl and I think...I think that maybe it's right for me to love you as a man does a woman...But then I remember our past together and feel I'd be taking advantage of you...It doesn't seem right."
"Oh...Wolvie..." Jubilee said, half a sigh, "All we can do is make it right."
"I don't know, Jubilee." He said, the ache in his soul apparent in his tone, "I don't know."
(Note from Skayda: Oooooh...What's gonna happen next? Wolvie and Jubes 'together'? I can't wait to find out... :D If Wolverine and Jubilee did end up together and had a kid...what would his or her name be? Wolvijube? Jubirine? (My boyfriend and little sister thought of those names...mixing Wolvie and Jubes names together...silly, huh? It is the morning after Halloween....Happy belated Halloween for those of you who celebrate it. :D )
Jubilee walked up to Logan and set her hand on his shoulder. "Wolvie what's really holdin' ya back here? I mean ya've all but admitted that ya feel the same way I do. It can't be the age thing. When ya first joined the X-men ya put the moves on Jean and she was barely older than I am now."
"Yeah darlin' but I hadn't known Jean for years before that. But yer right. I guess I'm afraid of screwin' up what we got now. Yer important ta me in so many ways I can't even describe what ya mean ta me. I don't wantta lose that over somethin' we started 'cause ya got drunk."
Jubilee's eye narrowed. 'He's still thinks it was just the drinks talkin' when I kissed him. I'll just have ta show him otherwise.' She grinned, the expression looking like it belonged more on Wolverine than her. Quickly she grabbed his face turned it towards her and kissed him again. 'I must really have him flustered. Normally I wouldn't be able to catch him by surprise twice in just a few days.'
He turned from her with a barely suppressed growl, his whole being filled with the scent of her...intoxicating...His fingers brushed against the exposed flesh of her shoulders as he broke the embrace she had him in.
"Wolvie..." She said, in a whisper, "Let me..."
He could feel her reaching out to him, standing behind him now...The heat from her body washed over him, calling him, and he longed to answer.
"You shouldn't do that, Darlin'." He said, through clenched teeth, "God, Jubilee!" He said aruptly as he spun around to face her again, His eyes wide with fear and yearning in one, "We've been talkin' ourselves around in circles here and we're not one step closer to findin' out what's best..."
"You know what's best, Wolvie...Logan..." She said, her head tilted slightly to one side, as she used to do as a kid whenever she was challenging an authority figure...or anyone else for that matter, Yet her eyes were red-rimmed and full of hope bordering on complete despair, "And so do I. Why are we tormenting each other like this? You told me once that I should be afraid of not livin' my life to the fullest...Well, the only way I'm ever going to do that is if your there...."
"I wanna be there for ya, Jubilee..." Logan said.
"Like you said, We've talked ourselves around in circles here all night...I can't help the way I feel and I can't change it either...I wouldn't want to anyway. You're the best thing that's ever happened to me...I know you think it was the drinks..."
"Oh,Jubilee..." He said, "I don't think yer feelin's come from the booze...That just allowed you to be a little less careful about hidin' em."
"Yeah? Well, I'm not drunk now, Wolvie." She said, "Am I? And when I kissed you just now I felt you responding...I felt you kissing me back before you stopped it."
"I'm sorry..." He said, and she realized that he'd begun pacing the room...like a caged animal...
"That's nothing to be sorry about, Logan!" She cried, her arms spread wide, standing near the window in her underwear, looking tired and confused, hopeful and fearful...so many emotions...so many scents drifting from her towards him...
"That must mean you realize, deep down," She went on, "That we're meant for each other..."
"All it means is I'm a man and your a woman and sometimes my body don't wanna wait for instructions from my mind, Darlin'." He said, his voice was hard to understand beneath the bestial rumbling tones...He picked up the discarded bottle of whiskey from the bedside table and tipped it towards his mouth. It was the fourth bottle and only half-full...or half-empty, depending on his mood.
"Oh, That's a great way to handle this, Wolvie." She said sarcastically, "Drink. Well, 'Long as you've got the damned bottle with ya, hand it over...may as well lower myself to the bottom of it all too..."
"No. You don't need this stuff..." He said, taking the nearly empty bottle to the bathroom. She heard the distict sound of glass hitting porcelain and realized that he'd just busted the bottle...probably over the sink.
Well, She thought, Now what? May as well get dressed. My clothes outta be dry by now.
She had the feeling that it would take a lot more than just one night of talking 'round and 'round to get what she wanted...She sighed and turned towards the bathroom just Logan was emerging...The glass from the bottle cradled in his hands...small cuts healing up as he dumped the glass in a paper bag near the front door...But maybe, in time, They would both get what they wanted. Maybe, in time, She would find her way past the thorns in his mind and heart which allowed her to get a little closer to him that most people, though kept her from getting too close....She'd find a way to get him to realize she wasn't gonna leave him...ever.
"I'll just have to wait a little longer." She whispered to herself, even though she knew he could hear her as she slipped past him on her way to the bathroom to get dressed, "We havn't settled this, Wolvie." She added, louder, before she closed the door.
He didn't answer. He knew she was right.
"I don't think this'll ever be truly settled, Darlin'."
Jubilee had checked out of the motel and returned to the X-mansion after she had finished talking to Logan. 'I can't stay next door ta Wolvie right now and runnin' away isn't the answer.'
Shortly after she left Logan checked out as well. He was debating whether or not to return to the mansion or head out to a bar. 'Beatin' up on some punk in a bar ain't gonna cut it right now. Maybe I'll get lucky and the team will get called on a mission and I'll get ta beat up on some super-powered punk tryin' ta take over the world.
Bobby Drake and Hank McCoy were watching a Three Stooges Marathon as Jubilee stomped in. Drake turned to look at her. "Hey Jubilee where were you? You've alrady missed half the Curly episodes." He had looked for both her and Logan before it began. Jubilee loved slapstick comedy and Logan loved violence of any sort even in fun.
"None of yer damn business Drake," she said with growl reminiscent of Wolverine.
Logan came in about 15 minutes later. "Yo Wolverine, you know what's going on with Jubilee? She came in her in a pretty bad mood a little bit ago."
'Oh great she's back here too. Man I was hopin' fer just a few hours away from her ta get my head on straight.' "Shut the hell up Drake."
Bobby glanced over at Hank. "What do you think is bothering them."
"I haven't the slightest inclination as to what is upsetting our nearly inseparable duo, my frosty friend."
Jubilee turned on the stereo in her room, cranking the volume. She had her door shut, though she could care less if she were bothering anyone. It was the afternoon on a Sunday anyway, so it was unlikely anyone would be around to be bothered by her music. She listened to the D.J. harp about a contest or other and first notes of new song wafted through the speakers mounted on either side of her bed.
"Aah!" She cried and jumped up to turn the station as Faith Hill's 'This Kiss' began, "I really DON'T need THAT song right now..."
"I can't stand this." She said, her old restlessness coming to her tenfold, "I gotta get out...Do something..."
She spied her skates leaning against her closet door and moments later she's snatched them up and ran out the door and down the stairs. She nearly knocked Bobby down on her way out the front door.
"Hey! Watch were your running, Jubilee!" He cried, catching his balance, "Where are you going? You already missed most of the 'Stooges Marathon!"
"Just leave me alone, Okay?" She said, slamming the door behind her.
She paused on the front porch to put on her skates and lace up...She ditched her walking shoes on the porch...Planning on picking them up on the way back into the house when she got home later.
"Now what, Lee?" She asked herself as she speed down the street, picking up speed and feeling the wind in her teeth, invigorating...Trying to force herself past thoughts of Wolverine...At the mere thought of his name she forced herself to go faster, "I just wanna skate and forget...for now...Can't I at least do that much?"
You can run away from this, Lee. A tiny, yet loud voice inside her mind said as she dodged a car and jumped the sidewalk, barely missing two lovers walking hand in hand when she skated between them and forced them to let go of each other momentarily. No matter where you go...What you do...You can't run away...
"I'm not running away, creep." She snarled, "I'm skating...God! I just need some time to think...To...To get everything situated out right and all..."
You can't run away, Lee...The voice taunted...You can't run away...
"Stop it!" She cried, sick of her own thoughts, "Just stop it!"
"Hey! Girl watch out!!"
Jubilee looked in time to see that she'd not timed her last jump from sidewalk to street correctly and a car with a rather loud horn was heading straight at her. She had no time to react, it all happened so fast...The man on the sidewalk yelling out a warning, The sight of the car heading towards her at breakneck speed, the sound of tires squealing to a halt, smell of burnt rubber, The feel of the car hitting her side, boosting her onto the hood and then onto the ground with a final painful impact...Then as the darkness began closing in around her and a small crowd began to gather around her, a name lingers on her lips...
"Jubilee!" Logan started, Dodging the computer simulated Sabretooth's right hook and shouting; "End the program!"
"But Logan, You have barely raised your normal levels of..."
"End it, Hank!" Wolverine stalked to the door, leaving the computer-Sabretooth snarling and growling behind him, "Jubilee's hurt. I gotta go to her."
Beast pushed a button on the console near the window above the Danger Room and the program ended.
"How do you know she's hurt, Logan?" He asked, "She went out skating an hour ago, didn't she?"
"I don't know how I know." Wolverine said, "Just know. I gotta go find her."
"Wait." Hank said, feeling it better not to argue with Logan when he was in this state of mind, "I'll tell the others, gather as many as I can, It's Sunday you know, and help you find her..."
"Can find her on my own." Wolverine said.
"True, My friend." Hank agreed, "But, What if what's happened to her is too much for you to handle alone?"
Logan didn't answer, only pushed past Hank and made his way outside...But, He didn't tell Beast that he couldn't tell the rest of the team to try and help...
He found her tennis shoes on the front step where she had left them. The laces were knotted and it looked as if she didn't untie them at all, just slipped the shoes on and off easily enough without untying them.
Sniffing the air, testing the breeze and faint nuances in the air around him, It wasn't long before he picked up her scent...And decided to follow on foot...Where he could sift though the smells easier and follow her's.
She wasn't that far away, he realized as the trail seemed to grow fresher the farther he ran down the street, In fact, if his tracking skills were worth anything she should be just around the corner...
"Jubilee!" He cried when he didn't see her. He did, however, see the blood on the street, drying to a dirty brown color in the fading afternoon sunlight and a piece yellow material stuck to the ground, held within a patch of blood. Ignoring traffic, he went to the street and picked up the piece of material...held it to his nose and knew...Jubilee...It was a piece of her jacket, and there was no mistaking the blood.
"God, Please let her be all right..." He whispered fiercely, not even aware that he had popped his claws, "Don't let it happen again..."
"Hey, Short-stuff!" A loud male voice bellowed at him, "Get outta the street, Ya wanna get runned over like the girl?"
Wolverine growled, still in a half-crouch from bending down to pick up the scrap of material, and lunged at him...Grabbing the rather robust man by his throat, forcing him into the wall of a nearby building. "What do know about it, Bub?" He snarled, tracing the claws of his right hand across the man's chest, non-too-gently, "You'd better not have anything to do with it."
"Lemme go, ya crazy mutie!" The man cried, a rightful shake in his voice, "P-please! I swear I don' know nothin'. I saw the girl get hit and then ambulance came and picked her up! J-Jesus! Please! I didn't have anything to do with it!"
Wolverine let him go. Reluctantly. It would've more satisfying to carve him another bellybutton. He sheathed his claws and gave the man some breathing room.
"Ya stink of fear." He said, "And truth...What hospital they take her to?"
"N-Nearest one!" He cried and ran off down the street, face pale, eyes wide...Logan let him go. Jubilee was more important right now.
"Sir! You can't just barge in here and...and...upset our patients that way!" The head nurse, Inga, cried as Logan strode down the corridor, upsetting a tray of bandages and frightening a little old lady near the lobby.
"Sorry about that." Logan said, stopping to face the nurse, "I have to see a friend here. She's down there..." He gestured towards a large double opening door and turned to go.
"Sir!" The nurse called again, "Wait! You can't go into the wing!"
"Just watch me, Lady." He said before the doors swung shut behind him. The head nurse Inga was left staring at the ICU lettering across the doors and fuming.
"Jubilee..." Logan found her. She didn't look good. Her right arm was bound up in a cast already, as was her left hand up to the wrist. She has an IV hooked up to her and tubes running from her arm, inside her nose as well.
"Jubilee." He said again as he reached to smooth the matted and still-blood clotted hair from her face. He cringed inwardly as he saw how bruised and scratched her face was...no doubt from hitting the pavement with it, "I'm so sorry I wasn't there for ya..."
"Wolvie..." She whispered hoarsely, Tried to smile, it turned into a grimace, "Guess I didn't look both ways...before I crossed..."
Logan didn't reply, he only touched her shoulder gently, allowing his fear for her surfuce slightly in the way he looked down at her.
"Wolvie..." She said, at last, "The doctor's say I'm gonna be all right, ya know."
"I couldn't forgive myself if you had..." He turned away from her, "Jubes..."
"Don't talk like that, Logan!" She cried, and coughed at the suddenness of her movement, "I told you before I wouldn't die on ya and I meant it!"
"I know, Darlin'." He said and was facing her again, "I just love ya too much to think about losin' ya."
"You won't lose me, Wolvie." She said softly, "You won't."
"You should try to rest, Jubilee." He said to her, aware of Hank and the rest of the X-Men waiting outside the room, "Go to sleep."
"Don't worry, Darlin'." He said, bent down to kiss her softly on her bruised and tender lips, careful so as not to hurt her more, "I'll be within earshot o' ya...You just holler for me when ya wake up and I'll be here."
Jubilee sighed and closed her eyes.
Jubilee was always quick to use jokes to improve bad situations, even when alone. 'HE kissed ME. I'm going to have ta get hurt more often.'
Logan found the doctor who was taking care of Jubilee. "She gonna be okay, Doc?"
"Certainly, none of her injuries are life threatening. However she is going to be in a lot of pain for quite a while."
(Note from Jason Barnett: guess I'll end this.)
Jubilee woke up after a few hours sleep and noticed Wolverine was sitting beside her. "Ya know Wolvie, I ain't gonna die. Ya don't have ta spend all yar time in here."
"Well, I haven't been here the WHOLE time, just most a it. The other X-men showed up and I had ta explain what happened ta ya. Sent 'em home and i told 'em I'd call when ya woke up so they could come back down."
There was a few moments of silence between them. Then Jubilee got an idea and spoke before she could chicken out. "Hey Wolvie, what say we go out somewhere after I get outta here?"
Logan gave a soft growl and glared at her for a moment. "Jubes, its that kinda stuff that gotcha here in the first place."
"No, its tryin' ta ignore that kinda stuff that got me here. I told ya I love ya and I meant it. And I can tell by the way yar acting that ya got feelings fer me. So Do ya want ta go out sometime or what." Jubilee was having a hard time believing she had asked Wolvie out.
A look of defeat crossed Logan's face briefly. Finally he reached over and kissed her gently. "Yeah darlin'," he said softly, "I'd like that."
(Note from Jason Barnett: I guess that's a good a place as any to end it. But if people want to keep it going then great.)
(Another annoying note from Skayda: That was loooong story. I am gonna copy and save it to my computer in one of my folders forever and ever. :) )