Standard disclaimer applies

Jubilee burst through the door of the apartment.

"Remy!"

She ran into his bedroom but found it empty.

"Remy?"

She moved into the living room, but he wasn't there either. Sighing she dropped her bag with a heavy thunk, and walked into the kitchen to make some coffee.

Her exams were finally finished. Finito. Hopefully, she would never have to write an essay on Ibsen or Plath again. No more mind-numbing French grammar with its pluperfect, imperfect blah, blah, blah. Sometimes it had seemed as though this moment would never come and she would spend the rest of her days studying, chained to a desk and puzzling over yet another stats question.

She glanced down at her uniform and grinned. No more uniform! No more awkward skirt, no more desperately searching for a pair of tights in the morning because the pair she had worn the previous day had mysteriously developed a ladder overnight. She tugged at the tie, loosening it and pulled the jumper over her head. Stupid tie, she hated ties. She had had to get Remy to teach her how to knot it properly. She could never get it completely right though, and often he would stop her on the way out and straighten it in some way.

The coffee maker clicked and she filled a mug. She looked down, seeing her sensible black school shoes. She kicked them off. Sneakers. From now on she would only wear sneakers or preposterously high heels. Nothing sensible or conservative. Yes, truly she was now a wild child.

She stared dreamily around the kitchen, rejoicing in her new found freedom. A note stuck to the fridge caught her attention and she moved closer to read it.

J- Bella wants me for v. quick job. Should be home by 8. -R

Jubilee harrumphed to herself, her excitement a little deflated. She had hoped to spend tonight with him, not dinner by candlelight or anything, pizza and a video was more the idea she had in mind. She glanced at the phone. Dani had mentioned that a few of them were going out later. She might call her to find out when and where. Just in case she was stood up.

*** *** ***

She was sitting on the sofa, dressed for her night out and dividing her attention between the phone and her wristwatch. Nearly ten and no sign of him. Dani would be calling for her in a few minutes.

She stood up and started pacing, stopping in front of the mirror in the hallway to check her reflection. Low slung black jeans, red halter-neck and a pair of strappy black sandals which added at least two inches to her height. She looked good, she knew Remy would think so but he wasn't there and she was getting pissed off.

She sat down again, drummed her fingers on the coffee table. Looked at her watch, stared at the phone. If he only rang. She wouldn't go out if he rang. To distract herself she began to rummage through her handbag. Purse¡¦phone¡¦keys¡¦ID card¡¦lipstick¡¦foundation. She sighed and zipped the bag shut, rummaging completed. Back to staring at the telephone and watching the minute hand creep slowly forward on her watch.

The doorbell rang, she started and rose to answer it.

"Hey. Ready?"

Jubilee glanced behind her at the empty apartment, "Let me just get my stuff."

She returned to the living-room, grabbed her bag and cord jacket and left.

*** *** ***

Pushing her way through the throng of dancers, Jubilee made her way back to the small table her friends had managed to commandeer, several bottles grasped between her fingers.

"Ok I got Coors¡¦Bud," she dispensed the drinks to the two boys, "and an Archers for you," she handed it to Dani, smirking, "such a girly drink."

Her friend's response was to stick her tongue out, "Yeah, whatever, I saw that Malibu and Coke."

Jubilee laughed, perching herself on the high stool, "Where's Josh?"

Ned answered her, shouting over music, "Over there," he nodded to the dance floor, "with Eloise."

Another of their classmates was with them, more specifically a boy from Jubilee's maths class who had given her a helping hand any time she had had any difficulties. She stood up now and held out a hand to him.

"I wanna dance."

He laughed and took it, "Since you asked so nicely."

Giving him a bright smile, she led him into the pulsating crowd under the speculative eye of Dani who was quickly distracted by her boyfriend.

Ben was a good dancer, she found, but eventually they were separated. To Jubilee's amusement he was led off by a girl who shimmied in between them and soon after Joshua made his way to her side.

Under the hazy influence of the alcohol she had imbibed, Jubilee began to ponder the attractions that had drawn her to him in the first place. His looks, of course, physical attraction had always been there. He may not have had the irresistible dark magnetism of Remy but few did, after all, and Josh's boyish charm had been sufficiently appealing for her.

She tilted her head back to look at his face, responding to the grin there. Dani's confused queries long ago as to the reasons behind her break-up with Josh now filtered through her head.

A little annoyed with herself for checking out her ex, she detached herself from him and motioned that she was returning to the table. He nodded and she gradually wove her way through the crowd and back to Dani and Ned. She raised an eyebrow when she found them lip-locked, completely oblivious to her presence as she picked up her glass. Her phone was lying on the table and she noticed a missed call message displayed on it. Deciding that to notify the couple of her departure would be pointless she took the phone and pushed her way to the other side of the club and into the relative quiet of the ladies' toilets. She rang her voicemail inbox and found a terse message from Remy waiting for her. She immediately dialled home.

"Hello?"

"Hey, Remy it's me."

"Where are you?" he asked curtly.

"I'm out¡¦with Dani and the others."

"Did you see my note?"

"I saw it."

"Why didn't you wait for me?"

"You were late," she massaged her temple, "look, I gotta go. I'll talk to you when I get back¡¦or tomorrow or something."

"Jubilee, come home now."

She laughed, "I don't think so Gumbo. I haven't been had a night out in ages."

"We need to talk."

A stall became free and she took it, putting down the lid of the toilet and sitting.

"We can talk tomorrow."

"We can talk tonight."

"So wait up for me and we'll talk then."

"When you're completely pissed? Non."

"I'm not drinking much."

"You're a lightweight Lee, you don't need to drink much."

"What's with the Lee shit? You mad with me about somethin'?"

"No. Just come home."

"Listen, I'm out with my friends, having a little fun for the first time in¡¦I dunno. We've got plenty of time to talk."

"We need to have this conversation."

"What conversation?" She asked wearily.

"About when we're goin' to tell them."

She fell silent, chewing her lower lip.

"You still there?"

"Yeah, yeah, here."

"So, come home."

"We can-"

"Come home." No longer a request, demand or statement. A command. Her first instinct was to oppose it, angrily. But she wanted to continue this argument face to face.

"Fine, I'll get a taxi."

"I'll call it for you."

He hung up and she was left fuming silently in the toilet. She closed her phone with a snap, leaving the stall and stalking from the toilets which prompted one girl to declare disgustedly: "Eww! She didn't even wash her hands!"

Dani and Ned were in the same position they had been ten minutes earlier, she had to admire their ability to block out the world. She threw her phone into her bag, grabbed her coat and whistled to attract the attention of the couple.

Dani turned to her, confused, "What?"

"I gotta go."

"Huh? Why?"

She waved a hand broadly, "Oh, it's just Remy. He wants to talk about some stuff, he's just pullin' rank," she grinned at her friends, "have a good night, kay? I'll call you tomorrow."

"Nuh uh," Dani stood up, "I'll walk with you, I'm not letting you go outside alone after what happened last time."

"I'm getting a taxi, I'll be fine."

Dani crossed her arms.

She relented, "Fine, but just to the door. I'm getting picked up outside. Sorry Ned," she said to the boy, "I'll have her back in fifteen minutes, tops, promise."

"No problem Ju, I'll talk to you later."

"See ya."

The two manoeuvred their way to the club entrance where they stood, waiting for Jubilee's taxi to arrive. The coolness of the night air prompted Jubilee to don her jacket and Dani to rub her arms briskly.

"I'm getting picked up right here, I'll be fine."

"Jubi, I'm not going anywhere until you're safely in that car."

Reading the immovability of her friend's determination, she once again abandoned the struggle and the two waited silently together.

*** *** ***

She jammed the key in the lock, pushed the door in but refrained from slamming it behind her. She could hear the television in the living-room and followed the sound to find him sprawled on the sofa, feet up on the coffee table.

"What was that all about?"

He raised an eyebrow at her aggression and muted the television set, "What's that?"

"You just ordered me home," She threw her bag and jacket on an armchair, "What the fuck was that about?"

He scrutinised her thoughtfully, "You're drunk."

"I'm not drunk, I'm just angry," she shoved her keys in her pocket and began to pace.

He retained his sceptical look and took his feet from the table, placed them on the ground and leaned forward, "We need to talk about this aussit¡¦ que possible."

"Speak English, you always get more bloody French every time you do a job for them."

"You're angry about my missions for the Guild?"

She threw her hands up, "No! It's fairly frickin' simple, I'm angry 'cause you basically ordered me home from my first night out with my friends in months. We were celebrating!"

"De sooner we get this sorted, the sooner we'll know where things go from here," he stated blandly and stood up, "you want some coffee?"

"No!" she halted her pacing, "wait, yeah, fine."

He left the room and she plopped into the armchair, shifting to pull her handbag from under her. He soon returned with two mugs and handed her one.

"Thanks," she said briefly and waited for him to resettle on the sofa.

"We need to decide what's the most diplomatic way to tell them, all right?"

Jubilee's shoulders drooped and she sank back into the seat, "Right."

"Are you plannin' to visit the mansion this summer?"

"Umm actually," she avoided his eyes under the ruse of blowing on the hot liquid, "I told Logan I'd stay there until college started." She didn't know why she'd kept this titbit to herself, hadn't deemed it important or necessary perhaps.

Her statement was meet with silence and she peeked at him through a lock of hair that had freed itself from the ponytail. He looked slightly stunned but she recognised, from his eyes that his mind was working quickly.

"So we must tell them when you arrive there."

Jubilee stood up abruptly, "I had a lot of beer, I need to pee." She disappeared down the hallway and Remy was left trying to plan their confrontation with, or confession to, the team. When she returned, her hair was around her shoulders and when she raised her arms to retie it, the top rose up to expose her smooth, toned stomach. She smiled warmly at him, "Do we have to talk about this now? Couldn't we do something more, I dunno, fun?"

He seemed to contemplate her suggestion for a moment but, "We need to get this settled."

She gritted her teeth and re-seated herself.

"I didn't know you'd told Logan that," he said casually.

She shrugged, "Forgot, didn't think it was a big deal."

"Guess not."

"Do we have to do this now? I'm actually pretty tired, I'd like to go to bed."

"I told ya, I want us to have this sorted," he fixed her with a piercing stare, "no more puttin' it off."

She suppressed the urge to squirm under his gaze, "I'm not putting anything off. Just don't see why we have to decide everything now is all."

"I told Bella I'd do some work for her," he confessed, "I have to leave tomorrow morning."

She smiled sharply.

"I couldn't help it," he explained, "The¡¦work she wanted done, it needs more time than I thought but I left early today so I could talk to you, but this job¡¦she really needs me for it."

"Out of all the thieves in New Orleans she couldn't find one that could do this for her?" Jubilee asked scornfully.

"Belladonna don't trust easy," he shrugged, "she's still not comfortable wit' some of us t'ieves."

"Boohoo," she muttered.

Remy gave her a questioning look but let it slide, "So now we need to decide how we are gonna do this."

"Geez, what's with the rush?" she stood up and began pacing again.

"Rush? We've been doin' this for nearly six months, you call that rushing?" he asked lightly.

She tugged on her ponytail, "I don't know¡¦I just," she shook her head, "I dunno."

He watched her silently.

She stopped pacing and turned her head to look at him, "You wanna tell them, huh?"

"Yeah, I do. Somethin' wrong with dat?"

"No, no," she shook her head and resumed pacing, "that's good, I mean¡¦that's really good. I'm glad."

"Well I'm glad that you're glad, but that hasn't gotten us anywhere ch¡¦e," he said, a note of impatience edging its way into his voice, "how are we goin' to do this?"

"I'm glad you want to tell them an' all but," she was making anxious gestures with her hands, "do you really think this is the right time?"

"When's the right time gonna be?"

"I don't know¡¦"

"Sounds like you don't want them to know."

"That's not true."

"So we tell them when we go back."

"You think they're going to like this Remy?" she asked incredulously, "we're not exactly gonna get a 'well done guys, we were waiting for you two to get your act together', you know?"

"I'm not an idiot."

"Oh stop being so bloody defensive," she snapped.

"Then stop stating the obvious," he replied brusquely, "I know an' I don't really care."

"Well I care," she stated firmly, "I don't think we should do this right now."

"When should we do it?"

"I don't know."

"When you leave for college?"

"I don't know¡¦"

"After your first year is over?"

"I don't know¡¦"

"When then?" he shouted, now also standing.

"I don't know!" she screamed back at him.

They stared at each other for a moment.

"I'm gettin' a drink," he said and strode into the dining room.

Jubilee dropped into the armchair and took a sip of coffee, tapping her fingers on the side of the mug as she waited for him to return. She had known for some time that the decision would have to be made, by her most likely, as he could live forever on 'maybe' and 'someday'. And she was tempted to too.

When he came back into the room, glass in hand, she raised her head, "I'm sorry for shouting at you."

He seemed to relax a little at this and sat down, "Me too."

"I just don't see why we have to tell them now," she explained cautiously, hoping for a stay of execution, "I thought things were going well."

He stared at her in disbelief, "Jubilee we don't go out together in case someone might see us. I can't even fuckin' kiss you outside this apartment."

She dropped her head and kept her eyes fixed on her coffee.

"All this skulkin' around makes me feel guilty, and we don't have anything to be ashamed of," he insisted, "I want them to know."

She looked up at him, eyes bright, "I want that too, Remy but," she sighed, "but there's no way they'll accept this. There's just no way."

"They'd accept it eventually."

She shook her head, "That's not true and you know it. I don't even want to think about what Logan might do to you."

"They've hated me before," he said easily, "I managed to stay alive."

She view him sceptically, "Do you think I'm going to risk it for the sake of a few dates?"

"Fine," he shot back, stung by her easy dismissal of the value of a public relationship, "we keep it a secret. What happens when you go to college?"

She drew her finger along the rim of her mug, "Umm¡¦"

"Where are you goin' to college?"

"I've, uh," she cleared her throat, "I've been accepted to a psychology degree in Trinity, provisional on me getting really good marks of course¡¦" she trailed off.

"Trinity?" he echoed, "Isn't that in Ireland?"

"Yeah."

"You didn't tell me that."

"It never came up¡¦"

"Jesus, Jubilee," he stood up, brandishing his glass around, "do you expect me to move to Dublin?"

"No, I¡¦course not."

"Then how is this going to work?" he questioned, his voice growing louder, "how the fuck are we supposed to do this when you're in Ireland?" He froze and stared at her, "We're not are we?"

"Remy¡¦"

"We're not¡¦" he drained his glass and set it on the table before moving closer to her.

"Remy," she was disgusted to find tears leaking from her eyes and rubbed at them impatiently.

He sat on the edge of the coffee table, placed her cup on the floor and took her hands in his, "Isn't there anywhere else you want to go? An American college, or even a British one?"

She shook her head, "I don't want to go back to America yet¡¦"

"What about an English one?"

"No, I¡¦"

"What?"

She raised her eyes to his, make-up now ruined by the onslaught of tears, "You need to get back to the X-Men, me being here is just keeping you away from them," she brushed at her eyes again, annoyed at the ease by which tears came to her.

"Jubilee," he pulled on her hand to guarantee her attention, "I don't want to go back full-time. I'm happy the way t'ings are."

She shook her head, "No you're not. You have to leave practically all the time to help either the Guild or the X-Men anyway. This way it's just more¡¦permanent."

"I could get a place in Dublin, move there," he suggested, turning the idea over in his head.

"No we¡¦" she broke off and stood up, moving around him

He stood up and looked at her back, rigid with tension, reached out and touched her shoulder.

She pulled away and turned to face him, "I should have said something sooner."

He stared blankly at her, "I don't think it's impossible."

"You have responsibilities Remy," she pointed out calmly, "and I've been keeping you from them."

"That's-"

"Let me finish, would you?" she said harshly, "I've been holding you here. You're supposed to be the bloody patriarch of the Guild but you're never there! You're doing reserve work with Ororo but I know you want to be there as a full member and," she drew in a breath, "there are other things that need your¡¦attention."

"First of all, I never wanted to be the patriarch, it just got foisted on me. And I'm glad to be doin' half time with the X-Men, full-time would drive me nuts," he smiled at her, trying to lighten the mood but she was shaking her head in denial.

"It's not just that."

"What then?" he asked, confused and impatient.

She had known he would argue, just as she would in his position. But the facts remained and she hoped he would accept it as she had. But not now apparently. Not Remy who despite his cynical shell and ready smirk was a romantic to the end, Romeo to his Juliet of the day. Only not as willing to say die.

"Let's sit down," she led him to the sofa, holding his hands and they sat turned towards one another. His face was closed now, blank enough for her to project any feelings she might imagine onto it.

"You know you drive me nuts, right? I mean, all the time. Sometimes it's a toss-up between hitting you and kissing you."

Remy blinked then grinned, "Guess we know which impulse wins out, oui?"

"Don't do that."

"Do what?"

"Be all charming and Cajun¡¦"

"Jubilee," he smiled mildly, a faint mocking gleam present in his eyes, "this is a very odd way to break up with someone."

"Remy¡¦"

"You don't want to do this anymore, do you?"

She dropped her gaze, "No."

"You don't think we could make a long-distance relationship work?"

"You think you could hold out for me?" she smiled, a little twisted.

"I could try," he returned the smile, "you?"

"I don't know¡¦" she said quietly and he raised an eyebrow, "four years Remy, seeing each other only on holidays. What sort of relationship is that?" she sighed, "If I was with you, I'd want to touch you," she raised a hand to his face, skimming over the perpetual five-o'-clock shadow on his jaw, "all the time."

He caught the hand, rubbed his thumb in circles against her palm. She sighed again and pulled away gently.

"Remy, things," she raised her eyes to his again, "things have been weird between us lately."

He frowned, "Weird?"

"You don't think so?"

"I don't know," he dug a crumpled pack of cigarettes out from between the seat cushions and drew a lighter from his pocket, "tell me what's been weird."

"We're fighting¡¦over stupid things."

"You were stressed over the exams," he lit a cigarette and pocketed the lighter.

Jubilee gritted her teeth, "God you're arrogant."

"What?" he hadn't been expecting that.

"Blaming me for the fights, you're there too you know."

"You jump down my throat for no reason," he gestured towards her with the cigarette, "like now."

She dropped her face into her hands, "You're so bloody stubborn," she bemoaned.

He leaned forward, tapped his cigarette against the ashtray on the coffee table, irritation beginning to set in the lines of his face, "I'm stubborn? You never compromise on anything. It's always your way," he snapped.

"It is not."

"What do you call your decision to not try to keep us going while you're in college? And it is fucking typical that you would choose a college in Ireland."

"It's a really good college!"

"There are really good colleges in America."

"You think that if I went to an American one, it'd make a difference?"

"Wouldn't it?"

"No! You'd still be travelling all over the place with the X-Men and doing work for Belladonna," she shrugged, "the only difference is what you'd save on airfare, and even that's debatable."

"So, right, it's my fault then¡¦"

"No!" she smacked her forehead with her hand, "Damn it. This is what I'm talking about. You won't listen to me. You've already got your mind made up about what will or will not work."

"That's not true."

"And you know what else? You know what else is weird," she was hitting her stride now, all the irritations which had been stewing within her coming to the fore, "that we just have sex instead of talking things out. It's like a cure-all or something."

"That's not true either," he stubbed out the cigarette and drew another one from the packet.

"Really? When was the last time we talked about the future?"

He scowled and lit his cigarette, "Well, that's not just me, I've¡¦"

"I didn't say it was," her anger deflated, she now only felt weariness and rubbed at her face, "it's both of us."

"We could work on dat," he pointed out.

"We don't have time, there's," she exhaled sharply, "there's just no point."

Remy clenched his teeth to prevent himself from blurting out something he may regret later. He had honestly not seen this coming and did not know how to react. He had thought those in Westchester their greatest roadblock, greatest trial. Never had he suspected that she would take them apart from the inside out, casting doubt on what they had said, on what he had thought they both felt. But Rogue and Belladonna had taught him well, their waxing and waning love provided shields and armour to be donned in emergencies. He felt the need for that protection now.

"And there's that other thing¡¦"

He pinched the bridge of his nose, pressed the heel of his hand to his forehead, trying to offset his impending headache, "What other thing?"

"Rogue."

A heavy weight settled in his stomach, "What about her?"

Jubilee ran a hand through her hair, "I can't get past it," she shook her head ashamedly, "the two of you always have this vibe together."

"But we agreed to be friends."

"I know¡¦and sometimes I'm cool with it, but other times," she attempted to smile but could only manage a self-deprecating grimace, "all I can think about is how I used to see the two of you staring at each other, way back when you first came to the team."

"A lot's changed since then, petite," he attempted to reassure her, guilt and panic spurring his heart into a missed beat.

"You can't tell me you won't always love her," Jubilee countered simply.

"I love you now."

"You can't, can you?"

He wanted to say it, to quash her fears as unfounded, to lie and prove her wrong but he couldn't. She had trusted him completely for so long, so blatant an untruth may have damaged that one virtue he had retained in her eyes.

She pressed the back of her hand to her eyeballs, trying to stem the threat of tears. She hated this. She sniffed and squeezed her eyes shut, no more crying. Poker face Jubilee.

"It's okay, I kinda knew this from the beginning."

"I mean it ch¡¦e, I do love you," he stated firmly.

"Yeah, but it's not¡¦it's just not enough Gumbo," she quirked a painful smile at him, "maybe I'm being stupid or na¡¦e or somethin', but I don't¡¦I can't share you like that."

"I would never¡¦" he broke off and dropped his eyes but she was too preoccupied to notice.

"You know, I don't think you would either," she shrugged, "but you might only be stopping yourself because you felt a duty towards me. I don't want to be a duty."

"That's stupid, I don't think¡¦"

"I don't think you ever saw her as a duty¡¦" she trailed off and picked at her jeans.

Remy dropped his eyes, crushed his cigarette into the ashtray, "You want me to see you the same as her? That it?"

"I don't know, maybe not," she shook her head, "no, I guess I wanted you to trust me more, that if you needed help you'd come to me¡¦but," she began to chip off her nail polish with her thumbnail, "you don't¡¦you haven't."

"I didn't always confide in her either, you know."

"But you let her help you, which is a lot more than you let me do."

"Why did you wait so long to tell me dis?" he stood up and began pacing, "Why'd you just let this all get bigger and bigger? Dieu, Jubilee, how long have you been thinking like this?"

"I don't know¡¦awhile."

"This is really fuckin' unfair, you know that?"

She remained silent, chipping the red polish from her nails.

"Makes me think you¡¦that you¡¦" he grit his teeth, shoved his hands in his jeans' pockets.

She looked up, "That what?" she asked curiously.

"Nothin', I don't know¡¦" he sat down abruptly and faced her solemnly, "I don't have to go back to the X-Men, I could stick with the Guild."

Jubilee could see that this was his final offer, his final attempt. Remy was quickly retreating into his shell. His pride had taken a beating that night and she did feel guilty for being responsible for that. However, she also knew that she was making the right decision.

"That wouldn't be fair on you," she said softly and almost reached out to touch his knee, but recalled herself in time, "how could I say I cared about you if I kept you away from all your friends, your family?"

"No¡¦I guess you couldn't¡¦" he said, tone easy but bordering on mocking.

"This is best all round," she stated, attempting to lend conviction to her declaration, "you don't want to be tied to someone an ocean away for the next four years."

He didn't reply and drew out another cigarette.

Jubilee stared at her hands, clenched them until she could feel her nails biting into the skin of her palm, the minor physical pain a distraction. Opened her hands, examined the pale crescent indentations now there and clenched her hands again.

"It will be strange, being just friends," he commented absently.

She looked at him.

He fixed his gaze on her, uncanny red on black eyes hard and bright.

"I know¡¦it'll be strange¡¦

Remy was usually good with words, could manipulate them, and gift them with new meanings. He could charm his way out of the electric chair, Belladonna had always said. But this skill, this talent would desert him in the face of a loved one's departure. Every single fucking time.

He wanted to ask more, ask whether it would be different if Rogue was not an issue or the separation not so long. But he didn't.

"So¡¦that's it," he mused, mainly attempting to save face, to retain a few scraps of dignity. This was a familiar road for him, well travelled, although he always seemed to miss the warning sign for a sharp drop ahead.

"Yeah¡¦I guess so," she darted glances at him from under her lashes. "Remy¡¦" she started, fidgeting in her seat.

He looked at her, read the weakness there and reached out his left hand to her. She carefully interlocked the fingers of her right hand with his. He placed the unlit cigarette in the ashtray then raised his right hand to her shoulder, traced the bare skin there before resting his palm against her neck, thumb drawing along the line of her jaw. Her free hand now lay on his knee, nails scraping against the denim. He watched her, tightened his grip on her hand.

Jubilee had never felt this uncertain, this desperate with Remy before. She sat there, waiting. She had just ended their relationship, she wanted him to kiss her. Him¡¦his move. She knew she was being inconsistent, she knew it didn't make sense and she was being, maybe, just a little thoughtless¡¦but she wanted so much, for once and for all, for him to kiss her, touch her. Had she broken his heart? She wasn't sure, she might have broken her own.

He was staring at her and she found it difficult to raise her eyes to his, instead levelling her gaze at their hands. He slowly straightened his fingers from in between hers. Their fingers were now perfectly aligned, palm to palm, fingertip to fingertip. Then he began to slowly drag his fingers down along hers, the gentle friction surprisingly sensual and she bit her lip. He reached her palm, traced the ridged calluses there. He was being so slow, so painstaking and thorough that she could have screamed.

And it occurred to her, that she was being seduced, that in all their time together it had been she who dictated the pace, she who chose the moment. Never before had she been fully exposed to those charms, which were so legendary.

He had turned her hand so that her palm faced upwards and he raised it to his lips, eyes still trained on her, her eyes still on their hands. He kissed her palm slowly¡¦gently until his lips had touched every inch of skin there and the nerves of her hand seemed to be sparking simultaneously. And then he was leaning towards her, his hand sliding up her arm and then past it to brace on the armrest behind because he was urging her backwards. His other hand had gone to the back of her neck at some stage, supporting her head as she lay back but also teasing the hairs there.

She felt clumsy, trying to raise her feet onto the couch without kneeing him in the groin and she no longer had their clasped hands to focus on and was uncertain as to what to do with her now purposeless hand and where to place her eyes. He did not seem to have any such problems, he aligned himself instinctively with her body, coaxed her into the right position as her head now lay against the armrest.

Did it make her a bad person that she still wanted this so badly even after all she had said that night? That for all her reasoned explanations and decisions all it took was for him to look at her just so, touch her just a little and she forgot, simply forgot to be rational?

Because nothing, a nasty little voice in her head said, screamed break-up so much as sex.

She closed her eyes, moving her hands to safe positions on his shoulders and waited for him to make the next move¡¦and waited. She could feel his breath on her cheek, the warm press of him against her body but nothing more, and eventually she opened her eyes.

He was regarding her carefully, smiling slowly when she met his eyes. Intense did not justice to those eyes. When she saw his eyes it felt like he knew, like he knew how much she wanted this and how much she didn't want to want this. As though he could see right inside, see all the reasons she had kept to herself, see how important he had become despite her best attempts to the contrary and in that moment she felt exposed and vulnerable in a way that she had never experienced before. She tried to dismiss the feeling because, after all, was it not she who was the telepath? No one had ever mentioned that Remy might have any telepathic powers of his own. No, these feelings were only her paranoia. But the knowing smile on his face and that indescribable penetrating look in his eyes alarmed her and she felt the need to escape.

"I¡¦"

He moved the fingers of his right hand briefly over her lips, effectively silencing her. Her mouth and lips were dry now and she passed her tongue over her lips to wet them. His hand was currently following the curve of her neck to the hollow at the base of her throat, stroked back and forth across her collarbone.

The waiting was becoming too much for Jubilee, and she had started to wonder why she was letting him, well¡¦ She lost focus when he attached his lips to that lovely sensitive spot below her left ear, breathed shallowly until he moved his mouth a little lower and she realised he had untied her hair. She struggled to continue her thought¡¦they had finished this, it was over. They had every reason to not be doing this. She began to formulate a sentence to interrupt him.

And it was then that he kissed her.

The previous touches, caresses had not been a viable preparation for that kiss. They had been slow, tame. But when he kissed her it had been¡¦desperate. He had pressed his mouth to hers and she had kissed him back immediately, resolve evaporated and forgotten, nothing less than full reciprocation was demanded of her. He tasted like coffee (which she liked) and tobacco (which she hated) but to complain now would be churlish so she concentrated on the sensations he was generating inside her. The feeling that he was drawing her into him, that she was submerged in all the composite elements of Remy. Smell, sound, feel, taste and, if she could pry her eyelids open, sight.

Her previously purposeless hands were now tangled tightly in his hair, doubtless causing some measure of discomfort, and dedicated to the task of making sure he never stopped. His hands, however, had made short work of the tie at the back of her halter-neck and were already moving to the zip on the rest of the material. Determined to catch up she loosened her hold on his hair and slid her hands down his back to the bottom of this tee-shirt, tugging the top upwards impatiently until it was rolled under his arms. He broke their kiss to rise back and pull it over his head and the interlude allowed Jubilee to open her eyes.

He was beautiful she thought, hands skimming up over his shoulders and down onto his chest, right hand laid over his heart, beautiful and no longer hers. She paused, eyes ominously moist and raised them to meet his. She opened her mouth one last time to question the wisdom of what they were about to do.

He kissed her again. And again and again until, finally, she couldn't think to question anymore.

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Morning came and she awoke to find herself alone on the living-room floor. He had left for Belladonna. She sat on the floor, cheek pressed to her knees, wrapped in the throw-blanket which usually lay over the back of the sofa and stared blankly ahead. An ache rose in her chest, filled her lungs, travelled up her throat. Hard, insistent it penetrated through her until she gasped and decided that, in this moment, she would allow the ache to win.

(End Chapter 15)

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Many thanks to those who gave feedback on the previous chapters. Further feedback/constructive criticism is always greatly appreciated.