Torn at the Seams

by Eiluned

Date finished: 19 June 2001

Author's Site:

Archive: Yes to Alex and WXF. All others please ask first.

Disclaimer: Not mine. But if they were, Wolvie would walk around in tight cut-off jeans all the time. Rating: PG-13

Summary: Hot weather, ripped shorts, and telekinesis. Humor. Warnings: Some sexy talk. :) Notes: Response to Rockycat's swimwear challenge in the Cage. ::grin:: Huge thanks to Alex for the shorts idea and the beta. Here's to tight cut-offs. And, yes, they're out of character, but even X-Women need to have fun sometimes. ;)

"Storm! Ororo! Get over here!"

Jean hopped up onto the kitchen counter, practically pressing her face against the window. Ororo laughed at the sight her friend made. "What are you staring at?" she asked.

Jean just pointed frantically in the direction of the pool, so Storm pulled herself onto the counter beside Jean and peered outside.

And her jaw nearly hit the counter.

Wolverine was alone beside the swimming pool, puttering around with some of the cleaning equipment. There was nothing particularly unusual about that in itself, except that he was doing it in an indecently short pair of cut-off jeans. Obviously, as it was Logan, with no underwear.

He bent over to retrieve a net, and both women squealed like teenage girls at a boyband concert. "Oh, my god, did you see that?" Jean exclaimed, waving her hands around frantically. "I think that was his..."

"My goddess... I would never have imagined that Wolverine would be so... well endowed. He is of very short stature..."

"And he's not even hard... Can you imagine..."

"Wait, he is bending over again..."

They watched him lean over the pool, pulling the net across the surface of the water, their heads turning with each move, looking remarkably like a couple of penguins following a flashlight. His muscles bulged, and the sweat on his skin glistened in the sunlight. Jean swooned, leaning against Ororo. "Wow. Look at those muscles..." she whispered.

"Now, now, Jean. You are taken. I am not."

"But I can still fantasize."

Ororo pretended to think about that for a moment. "All right. But we must share him."

Jean cracked up, then squealed again when he bent to pick up a chlorine tablet. "He has the nicest ass..." she murmured, unconsciously tugging at her shirt.

"Look at those thighs..." Ororo added, sounding more than a little dreamy.

"Can you imagine wrapping your legs around those?"

They both dissolved into girly giggles, drawing a strange look from Nightcrawler, who was passing by the kitchen.

"Do you see that?" Storm said suddenly, pointing obviously at Logan's ass. "There's a hole right on the seam..."

"You have eyes like an eagle, woman," Jean replied, squinting. "Wait... I can see it!"

A particularly evil grin split her face, and Ororo couldn't help feeling a bit wary. Jean rarely got that look on her face, but when she did, all hell usually broke loose soon afterward.

"Watch this," she said.

Her forehead creased in concentration, and Logan's shorts suddenly ripped from crotch to waistband right up the back. Storm nearly choked laughing. "The many uses of telekinesis..." she snickered.

"What an ass..." Jean replied.

They could hear him cursing through the window, but what he did next neither of them expected. Instead of wrapping in a towel or otherwise doing something to cover his very naked bum, he shucked his shorts and tossed them onto a lawn chair.

"Omigod, he's naked," Jean said, her eyes huge. "Naked. Omigod, omigod, omigod."

"Good Goddess..."

Logan cussed at his shorts a few more times, then picked up the net again. "Tell me he's not going to clean the pool naked," Jean murmured, staring.

"I believe he is..."

"Holy shit..."

They watched him in dumbfounded silence for a moment. "I wonder if he will turn around soon," Ororo commented, and Jean burst into giggles again.

"Well, we'll certainly get an eyeful of that. Scott would have a conniption fit if he saw this--"

"If I saw what?"

Both Jean and Storm skittered off of the counter like a couple of startled cats, knocking a stack of plates to the floor. The plates shattered with a loud crash, and Ororo bolted out of the kitchen.

Scott was staring at Jean as if she'd grown a second head. "What on earth was that about?" he asked.

"Nothing. Gotta go," she stammered, and tore out of the kitchen on Storm's heels.

Scott looked at the shards of crockery on the floor and huffed. "And they didn't even clean up this mess."


Logan heard the crash of dishes and grinned slyly. Maybe he could get Gambit with the ripped cut-offs trick...


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